From dust

Some know what it’s like

To be born and bred from an

Independent and strong

black women who instilled

The same into your brain

From the very moment you

Came into this world

Some know that it gives

Certain benefits and allows

Whoever he or she is to

Do certain things certain ways

To take care of this

And to take care of that

In the midst of finding

A moment in the day

To figure things out

On your own.

But what about fear?

What about the fear it brings

The voice that tells you

You’re not good there yet

The fear that says you’re not

Working hard enough and not

In the way she did

Or the fear that you’ll be left

With nothing because you

Allowed someone else to carry

What you should have carried

All along

Or the fear that they’ll leave

Soaking up every piece of

Your heart and leave you with

Nothing

Or the fear that you’ll have to be

Like this forever and that’s

Not what you wanted

That’s not the life you wanted

This isn’t the life you wanted

This isn’t the life you wanted…

“You shall reap what you sow

And everything you sow will be yours

And yours alone”

But this wasn’t my garden

And I didn’t plant my seeds

I was fed from someone else’s crop

And now I’m here

Trying to be thankful for

This very thing.

//soul-tied

Yes,

At the time I knew

What love felt like

Because I set the standard.

Low or not,

I felt something strong

Pull me closer toward

My distorted expectation

Of what love should be

Because I was not taught

Anything different

From early on.

Then I let go of

That standard

And real love crushed

Even exceeded any

Expectation I had

And I loved it.

I became addicted to it:

Now,

My soul is tied

To it.

My soul is tied

To his.

Stop & love

I lost years

Trying to live

In the tomorrow

And missing all

Of those

Fulfilling moments

And neglecting

The beautiful things

Happening around me

Yet I don’t regret

That rushing spirit

Because of the pain

Choking life itself

And now that

I’m in love with

The life I’m living

I feel an even greater

Pull to sit and savor

All that is for me