my mind has been

poked and in a daze for so long

so that she would be convinced

to conform to the ideas of someone else.

the blood vessels that reside there

flowed in the opposite direction

of the birth code they were given

so that she would find something to cling to

her thoughts weren’t her thoughts

and the ideas of who she had to be

were fed to her with a rusty and grimy spoon

that was never touched or cleaned

and she’s the only one who allowed it to

all because she thought

it would

save

her.

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